You've no damn idea how hard it is to study here!
Ahhhh Paris.. The city of love. The city of light. You open the window, walk to your balcony, you can smell freshly baked baguette, beautiful Paris girls walking to go to work with Eiffel tower arrogantly standing in front of you. Or when you see all your friends’ photos in Facebook, smiling happily with twinkling Eiffel in background or traveling to exotic places you don't even know it existed. What can go wrong? That must be really a dream come true. Most of you must be imagining Paris that way, including me three years ago. So you decided you want to continue your study in France… It's time for you to WAKE UP!!!
The problem is, most of you just know the happy part. You saw only the pictures when we travel, but you have no damn idea how we live our daily life. It’s not a free lunch, you have responsibilities, especially if you got scholarship. If not, you have to make sure not to waste your parents’ money. In the end, the most important thing is school (nah, not for me. The reason I study there was getting paid to travel nyiahahahaha). So before you start disturbing us asking how to get scholarship or how to apply for universities, let me tell you la verite, or the truth.
It's very unlikely you will stay in cool parts of city.
I didn't know where I will live in Paris until the day I landed. The scholarship agency asked me to choose between three options where I wanna live (that's my friend, is coolest thing ever since finding apartment in Paris is way harder than finding a girlfriend). After considering all options (actually I used eeny meeny mini moe), I choose this €900/month studio room. Holy jambon, that's equal to my one year salary from my previous work! My room is awesome, the best among my other friends. Spacious, with private kitchen and bathroom. Just awesome. But boy oh boy, when I walk around my block, my first reaction was “cannard du connard, where the hell I am?” My imagination of Paris with vast boulevard, clean, with cute Parisian girls sipping coffee in cafe were gone in instant. Later I realized I chose the Northern district. One fifth Parisian are immigrants, and I live right in their headquarter. I’m not racist, but anywhere in the world, the immigrant area must be completely different than the center. No blonde girl, garbage everywhere, dirty, and looks damn dangerous. Unless your parents are rich, or you robbed the bank or you're extremely lucky, it's almost impossible for you to live in chic Paris district for under €700/month. And if you poor as fuck, sometime you have to live in zone 4 or 5 in suburb area. But you're not allowed to say you're Parisien.
The problem is, most of you just know the happy part. You saw only the pictures when we travel, but you have no damn idea how we live our daily life. It’s not a free lunch, you have responsibilities, especially if you got scholarship. If not, you have to make sure not to waste your parents’ money. In the end, the most important thing is school (nah, not for me. The reason I study there was getting paid to travel nyiahahahaha). So before you start disturbing us asking how to get scholarship or how to apply for universities, let me tell you la verite, or the truth.
It's very unlikely you will stay in cool parts of city.
I didn't know where I will live in Paris until the day I landed. The scholarship agency asked me to choose between three options where I wanna live (that's my friend, is coolest thing ever since finding apartment in Paris is way harder than finding a girlfriend). After considering all options (actually I used eeny meeny mini moe), I choose this €900/month studio room. Holy jambon, that's equal to my one year salary from my previous work! My room is awesome, the best among my other friends. Spacious, with private kitchen and bathroom. Just awesome. But boy oh boy, when I walk around my block, my first reaction was “cannard du connard, where the hell I am?” My imagination of Paris with vast boulevard, clean, with cute Parisian girls sipping coffee in cafe were gone in instant. Later I realized I chose the Northern district. One fifth Parisian are immigrants, and I live right in their headquarter. I’m not racist, but anywhere in the world, the immigrant area must be completely different than the center. No blonde girl, garbage everywhere, dirty, and looks damn dangerous. Unless your parents are rich, or you robbed the bank or you're extremely lucky, it's almost impossible for you to live in chic Paris district for under €700/month. And if you poor as fuck, sometime you have to live in zone 4 or 5 in suburb area. But you're not allowed to say you're Parisien.
School is bloody hard
So you're the best in school? You can get 9 for the exam just after study night before? And you confident with your French B2 level? Forget it! I tell you buddy, just to pass here is freaking difficult. On first semester I had a class starts at 8 am for 4 hours non-stop, and in French. My brain have to process three things every second. To translate, to understand what he's saying, and what should I note. The first one hour I'm fine, cool. But the next hour, my brain start to hang, its getting hot and my energy for one day just gone. The only thing I notice was just the teacher mustache move wildly. After two hours, we had a break. And that was the last time I attend his class. Lesson learned, I found a solution. For the other class I record using my camera so I can watch it later. Few weeks later when I'm traveling and my camera memory card is full, I've to decide which should I delete, my old photos or this recording. And by using Yao Ming's "bitch please" face, I deleted all the recordings. About the class? Of course I failed.
Teachers are absurdly cheap giving score
When I was in Bachelor, we love to compare our score. How much you got? “I’ve got 6”. “I got 8. Muahahaha you're dumb!”. In France they used 20 scale, and you pass if you got 10 or more. Here, you never ask the score you got but just simply "did you pass?" We don't give a fuck whether you got 10 or 18. Nobody cares. And you’ll surprise how the teacher give the score. I have a professor from Indonesia, he's cool, the class is fun, he's my fave teacher. All we need to do for his exam is just to memorize. So I memorize all his lesson from his PowerPoint and when I do the exam, I just copy paste word-by-word from his PPT. I was damn confidence. If I were in Indonesia, I'll get 18 (or 9 in 10 scale). So when he said we can see the score online, I'm never been that confident in my life. And then I saw it.... SURPRISE TROUDUC! He gave me 11. What de merdeeeee!
You will get your lowest score in your entire life
On third semester we have optional class. I chose "Economics of happiness and well being". The title sound so classy as hell in French, Economie du Bonheur et des etats subjectifs. But the problem was on that semester I only have class on Monday. Imagine that! It's not just long weekend, it's a daaaaaamn long weekend. I spent most of my time on the road. Before the exam, I copied all my friends note, memorizing word by word. But that damn teacher gave us tricky question. It was open questions so I wrote all the bullshit as my brain can imagine. I wrote about five pages, it was so bullshit if you read it you'll vomit and someone have to call KRANKENWAGEN immediately. PS: Krankenwagen is my favorite German word next to Uberrachung (surprise) and RASIERAPPARAT (shaver). Imagine screaming "Release the KRANKENWAGEN!" which means ambulance. Only German can make such an innocent word sounds terrifying.
And then the judgment day. The thing I hate most in France is how they show all our score, sometime they put it online or just print it complete with our goddamn name. I don't wanna see it, but what's the difference since all my friends knew. And I really curious to see how good I am to become an author. SURPRISE!!! I've got 3. T-R-O-I-S! No no no, not in 10 scale, in 20. He gave me 1,5! For God sake, in Indonesia if I write my name and the subject correctly plus re-write all the questions, I can get 4 at least. He gave me 1,5 of 5 pages exam. I think I would have got better score if I just left it blank or wrote how nice Parisian is (that'd be the hardest theme imaginable). But there is another good thing when you can see other people score. You'll immediately look for someone who fucked up more than you. And when I saw my friend got 2, I can’t stop smiling. T’es idiot toi. Muahahaha. And merci beaucoup.
So you're the best in school? You can get 9 for the exam just after study night before? And you confident with your French B2 level? Forget it! I tell you buddy, just to pass here is freaking difficult. On first semester I had a class starts at 8 am for 4 hours non-stop, and in French. My brain have to process three things every second. To translate, to understand what he's saying, and what should I note. The first one hour I'm fine, cool. But the next hour, my brain start to hang, its getting hot and my energy for one day just gone. The only thing I notice was just the teacher mustache move wildly. After two hours, we had a break. And that was the last time I attend his class. Lesson learned, I found a solution. For the other class I record using my camera so I can watch it later. Few weeks later when I'm traveling and my camera memory card is full, I've to decide which should I delete, my old photos or this recording. And by using Yao Ming's "bitch please" face, I deleted all the recordings. About the class? Of course I failed.
Teachers are absurdly cheap giving score
When I was in Bachelor, we love to compare our score. How much you got? “I’ve got 6”. “I got 8. Muahahaha you're dumb!”. In France they used 20 scale, and you pass if you got 10 or more. Here, you never ask the score you got but just simply "did you pass?" We don't give a fuck whether you got 10 or 18. Nobody cares. And you’ll surprise how the teacher give the score. I have a professor from Indonesia, he's cool, the class is fun, he's my fave teacher. All we need to do for his exam is just to memorize. So I memorize all his lesson from his PowerPoint and when I do the exam, I just copy paste word-by-word from his PPT. I was damn confidence. If I were in Indonesia, I'll get 18 (or 9 in 10 scale). So when he said we can see the score online, I'm never been that confident in my life. And then I saw it.... SURPRISE TROUDUC! He gave me 11. What de merdeeeee!
You will get your lowest score in your entire life
On third semester we have optional class. I chose "Economics of happiness and well being". The title sound so classy as hell in French, Economie du Bonheur et des etats subjectifs. But the problem was on that semester I only have class on Monday. Imagine that! It's not just long weekend, it's a daaaaaamn long weekend. I spent most of my time on the road. Before the exam, I copied all my friends note, memorizing word by word. But that damn teacher gave us tricky question. It was open questions so I wrote all the bullshit as my brain can imagine. I wrote about five pages, it was so bullshit if you read it you'll vomit and someone have to call KRANKENWAGEN immediately. PS: Krankenwagen is my favorite German word next to Uberrachung (surprise) and RASIERAPPARAT (shaver). Imagine screaming "Release the KRANKENWAGEN!" which means ambulance. Only German can make such an innocent word sounds terrifying.
And then the judgment day. The thing I hate most in France is how they show all our score, sometime they put it online or just print it complete with our goddamn name. I don't wanna see it, but what's the difference since all my friends knew. And I really curious to see how good I am to become an author. SURPRISE!!! I've got 3. T-R-O-I-S! No no no, not in 10 scale, in 20. He gave me 1,5! For God sake, in Indonesia if I write my name and the subject correctly plus re-write all the questions, I can get 4 at least. He gave me 1,5 of 5 pages exam. I think I would have got better score if I just left it blank or wrote how nice Parisian is (that'd be the hardest theme imaginable). But there is another good thing when you can see other people score. You'll immediately look for someone who fucked up more than you. And when I saw my friend got 2, I can’t stop smiling. T’es idiot toi. Muahahaha. And merci beaucoup.
I never feel that desperate during exam
Have you ever feel the feeling when you realized you're totally fucked up? I did. It was microenometrics exam. I hate statishit, and this subject is even worse. I was exactly like in Mr. Bean episode. You just stare the question for half an hour,while hold yourself very hard not to scream “what the hell is this shit?" Then you write your name and the subject beautifully that make the best calligrapher envy. Next, you pretend to write something to cover your shame not writing anything which in fact you just draw randomly. And you'll desperate even more seeing your friend asked for another paper. "Are you kidding me?" That's the first phase.
Then you said ok, calm down and read carefully. You've got to remember something. But most of time it didn't work. The first phase has wiped all your memory. Then panic attack strikes again. How come you not panic when you can’t even write any bullshit? Then we enter the final phase, ACCEPTANCE. You look around, look for someone whom you think has the same problem. I stare at my friend who always been good to me since he (or she I won’t tell you) always has score as low as me. And that time I realize dumb people has superpower. I keep stare at him since s(he) just staring his paper as well. Then suddenly he looked back at me, we made eye contact and we both smiling. No, not happy smile, this is kind of smile when you realized you're fucked, hopeless, and you just accept that you're dumb. I got 5 and he got the same result. What a good friend.
You're damn busy
Sometime you think all your teachers plotting some evil plan together. All of them gave you tasks in the same time with the same deadline. And if you study in private university or you enrolled in one year program only, do not expect you will enjoy your life. My friend studied in Ecole or famous private university. She barely have time to travel, every time I ask her, she was stress and has tons of paper, presentations and exam. To get a better view, she has to finish my one-year program in TWO MONTHS only. Even when we were back to Indonesia for summer vacation, I couldn't see her since she still has many homeworks to do. So if you want to enjoy life, choose public university, and for God sake, choose two-years program.
Groupwork is hell
Groupwork in Indonesia is so easy. The most clever in group become the leader. Everything he says, we reply "as you wish, Sir". No debate, no dispute. But here in France, it's like a war. I hate doing group project, and even worse if your other member are French. Don't get me wrong, it's just cultural difference. The French loveeeee to debate. Just deciding one simple thing can take hours. Everyone want to give the idea, and they're damn stubborn to make sure that his idea is the best and we use it. On winter school 2011, I was extremely lucky to be part of group with other 4 guys. All French... We were asked to make a hypothetical research and each groups were given a theme. For us, it was music. Then we have to create the research title, proposal plan, and predictive results. For the first day, we have to finish the proposal and the next day we will present it. But for us, we used all that time to hate each other. We agree each of us give idea, and then we will criticize then decide whose idea is the best. Stupid idea. Juuuuust 20 seconds after my first friend give his idea, the other start to debate. Blah blah blah blah and I just sit there. Ahhhh so this is how French work. Tres intéressant! But we were the second best the next day.
Where you come from does matter
There are 25 people in my class from 17 different countries. Pretty cool. I've been working with people from many nationalities and I observed we have such a distinct difference and similarities. I love working with German. I once worked with this beautiful genius German girl. She did two masters at same time, thus she often absent in class. But during the exam, she always got the best score. And one day we have project together. As 140% pure German, she fits all the German stereotypes. She really discipline, mad if I one hour late late to give my part, and she's perfectionist, but the output is always first class just like their cars. And then we have Asian, me, Vietnamese, Chinese, and my bff from Romania who’s more like Asian. We are all the same. We take it cool, not ambitious. When we go to my friend's place to do the project, we always end up watching series while eating pizzas until midnight. And one day before the deadline, we panicked and sent it to teacher five minutes before the deadline. How I miss that old time.
Thesis is shit
Masters in France is divided by two, Master 1 and 2. It's separate, so for each we have to make one thesis, and of course two defense! If you whining, complaining to do your thesis, just shut up! At least you just do it once. But luckily I can do it in English, I'll be dead meat if it must be in french.
So many people judge me by keep asking, "why are you just traveling? Didn't you study?" Tais toi! Who's stupid enough to take a picture of yourself while you're working on your thesis or during the exam. You look like a beggar. Pocket under your eyes, you didn’t have enough sleep, completely not photogenic. And exactly last year, I was damn busy working on thesis. I just get out of my room once in three days just to buy groceries. That was really hard time.
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However when I look it back now, I really want to cry. How I miss the old time. I regret skipping class, I regret didn’t spend more time together with my friends, I regret I’ve not been a good friend. If you willing to continue your study abroad, please do it. There are hundreds reasons, but I’ll just tell you two and you have to find the rest by yourself.
It was the best time of your life.
Live in Paris, have friends from every corner of the planet, traveling to places millions of people just dream of, are some examples. And you feel proud of yourself, a sense of self achievement. Who wouldn’t proud when people ask where you study and you reply, “In Universite Paris 1 Pantheon Sorbonne”. "Wow Paris. Cool!" And when you far from home, you will learn many things. How to be independent, how to live with just 10 euro for whole week, learn to cook, learn how to live in different cultures, things which is impossible if you just stay comfortly in your home country. Just like lyrics from Summer of 69 by Bryan Adams, "And if I had the choice; Yeah, I'd always wanna be there; Those were the best days of my life"
Have you ever feel the feeling when you realized you're totally fucked up? I did. It was microenometrics exam. I hate statishit, and this subject is even worse. I was exactly like in Mr. Bean episode. You just stare the question for half an hour,while hold yourself very hard not to scream “what the hell is this shit?" Then you write your name and the subject beautifully that make the best calligrapher envy. Next, you pretend to write something to cover your shame not writing anything which in fact you just draw randomly. And you'll desperate even more seeing your friend asked for another paper. "Are you kidding me?" That's the first phase.
Then you said ok, calm down and read carefully. You've got to remember something. But most of time it didn't work. The first phase has wiped all your memory. Then panic attack strikes again. How come you not panic when you can’t even write any bullshit? Then we enter the final phase, ACCEPTANCE. You look around, look for someone whom you think has the same problem. I stare at my friend who always been good to me since he (or she I won’t tell you) always has score as low as me. And that time I realize dumb people has superpower. I keep stare at him since s(he) just staring his paper as well. Then suddenly he looked back at me, we made eye contact and we both smiling. No, not happy smile, this is kind of smile when you realized you're fucked, hopeless, and you just accept that you're dumb. I got 5 and he got the same result. What a good friend.
You're damn busy
Sometime you think all your teachers plotting some evil plan together. All of them gave you tasks in the same time with the same deadline. And if you study in private university or you enrolled in one year program only, do not expect you will enjoy your life. My friend studied in Ecole or famous private university. She barely have time to travel, every time I ask her, she was stress and has tons of paper, presentations and exam. To get a better view, she has to finish my one-year program in TWO MONTHS only. Even when we were back to Indonesia for summer vacation, I couldn't see her since she still has many homeworks to do. So if you want to enjoy life, choose public university, and for God sake, choose two-years program.
Groupwork is hell
Groupwork in Indonesia is so easy. The most clever in group become the leader. Everything he says, we reply "as you wish, Sir". No debate, no dispute. But here in France, it's like a war. I hate doing group project, and even worse if your other member are French. Don't get me wrong, it's just cultural difference. The French loveeeee to debate. Just deciding one simple thing can take hours. Everyone want to give the idea, and they're damn stubborn to make sure that his idea is the best and we use it. On winter school 2011, I was extremely lucky to be part of group with other 4 guys. All French... We were asked to make a hypothetical research and each groups were given a theme. For us, it was music. Then we have to create the research title, proposal plan, and predictive results. For the first day, we have to finish the proposal and the next day we will present it. But for us, we used all that time to hate each other. We agree each of us give idea, and then we will criticize then decide whose idea is the best. Stupid idea. Juuuuust 20 seconds after my first friend give his idea, the other start to debate. Blah blah blah blah and I just sit there. Ahhhh so this is how French work. Tres intéressant! But we were the second best the next day.
Where you come from does matter
There are 25 people in my class from 17 different countries. Pretty cool. I've been working with people from many nationalities and I observed we have such a distinct difference and similarities. I love working with German. I once worked with this beautiful genius German girl. She did two masters at same time, thus she often absent in class. But during the exam, she always got the best score. And one day we have project together. As 140% pure German, she fits all the German stereotypes. She really discipline, mad if I one hour late late to give my part, and she's perfectionist, but the output is always first class just like their cars. And then we have Asian, me, Vietnamese, Chinese, and my bff from Romania who’s more like Asian. We are all the same. We take it cool, not ambitious. When we go to my friend's place to do the project, we always end up watching series while eating pizzas until midnight. And one day before the deadline, we panicked and sent it to teacher five minutes before the deadline. How I miss that old time.
Thesis is shit
Masters in France is divided by two, Master 1 and 2. It's separate, so for each we have to make one thesis, and of course two defense! If you whining, complaining to do your thesis, just shut up! At least you just do it once. But luckily I can do it in English, I'll be dead meat if it must be in french.
So many people judge me by keep asking, "why are you just traveling? Didn't you study?" Tais toi! Who's stupid enough to take a picture of yourself while you're working on your thesis or during the exam. You look like a beggar. Pocket under your eyes, you didn’t have enough sleep, completely not photogenic. And exactly last year, I was damn busy working on thesis. I just get out of my room once in three days just to buy groceries. That was really hard time.
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However when I look it back now, I really want to cry. How I miss the old time. I regret skipping class, I regret didn’t spend more time together with my friends, I regret I’ve not been a good friend. If you willing to continue your study abroad, please do it. There are hundreds reasons, but I’ll just tell you two and you have to find the rest by yourself.
It was the best time of your life.
Live in Paris, have friends from every corner of the planet, traveling to places millions of people just dream of, are some examples. And you feel proud of yourself, a sense of self achievement. Who wouldn’t proud when people ask where you study and you reply, “In Universite Paris 1 Pantheon Sorbonne”. "Wow Paris. Cool!" And when you far from home, you will learn many things. How to be independent, how to live with just 10 euro for whole week, learn to cook, learn how to live in different cultures, things which is impossible if you just stay comfortly in your home country. Just like lyrics from Summer of 69 by Bryan Adams, "And if I had the choice; Yeah, I'd always wanna be there; Those were the best days of my life"
You know the true meaning of friendship
When you abroad, your friend is your family. They are the most important thing. I realized now it’s better to have 1 true friend than 5 best friends or 100 “Facebook friends”. You just need one who you can count on. He/she always be there for you, you shared laugh and cry, she always there when you’re happy and sad. Someone you can spent hours talking or just her presence make you feel happy. I was so lucky I have one. Had she wasn’t there, I would’ve given up school since long ago. You know someone is your true friend when saying goodbye is the hardest thing ever. On my last day in Paris, I received many invitations, but I decided to went to her place, order pizza, and watch series, just like we used to do. But then, just like that wonderful song, it is "Time to say goodbye".
That two words was the most difficult thing I've ever said, it’s on my tip of your tongue but I can’t say it. I DON'T want to say it. It just stuck in my throat. I deny the reality that I won't see her again for only God knows until when. We hug for long time, tears flooding from my face. All the memories flashed in my eyes. I walked to the door, and hug her again I don’t want to release her. We keep telling to each other we must be strong, that I won’t cry anymore because we will see each other again. I told her "thank you for everything" and she said the same thing. I release my hug, while slowly release her hands. Then I see her for the last time, she gave me her best smile while trying really hard to hold her tears. And I start crying again. Then I said that word "good bye", then I walk away while hold the unimaginable temptation not to turn back and hug her again.
Damn, just writing this make me cry. If you read this, I miss you so much.
When you abroad, your friend is your family. They are the most important thing. I realized now it’s better to have 1 true friend than 5 best friends or 100 “Facebook friends”. You just need one who you can count on. He/she always be there for you, you shared laugh and cry, she always there when you’re happy and sad. Someone you can spent hours talking or just her presence make you feel happy. I was so lucky I have one. Had she wasn’t there, I would’ve given up school since long ago. You know someone is your true friend when saying goodbye is the hardest thing ever. On my last day in Paris, I received many invitations, but I decided to went to her place, order pizza, and watch series, just like we used to do. But then, just like that wonderful song, it is "Time to say goodbye".
That two words was the most difficult thing I've ever said, it’s on my tip of your tongue but I can’t say it. I DON'T want to say it. It just stuck in my throat. I deny the reality that I won't see her again for only God knows until when. We hug for long time, tears flooding from my face. All the memories flashed in my eyes. I walked to the door, and hug her again I don’t want to release her. We keep telling to each other we must be strong, that I won’t cry anymore because we will see each other again. I told her "thank you for everything" and she said the same thing. I release my hug, while slowly release her hands. Then I see her for the last time, she gave me her best smile while trying really hard to hold her tears. And I start crying again. Then I said that word "good bye", then I walk away while hold the unimaginable temptation not to turn back and hug her again.
Damn, just writing this make me cry. If you read this, I miss you so much.
So my dear friends, if you want to continue your study, just go. It is hard, but it’s really worth. In the end, what you learn in school is not that really matters. The experience and having good friends is the most important. It’s priceless and I will never exchange it for all money in the world. Good luck.
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